Be happy

Of late, people have been telling me that I am a happy person. I thank God for the transformation and renewed spirit in me because if you've known me a few years ago, I was far from a happy soul.

In between 2009 and the first few months of 2011, I carried with me emotional baggages of anger, bitterness and unforgiveness. Man, did i really struggle. I couldn't let go of the hurts from a failed relationship. I wouldn't go so far as to say it was a bad relationship because every experience is a lesson learnt, whether good or bad. As to why it didn't work out, I don't really wish to go into details. So when you don't deal with your hurts properly or channel it out appropriately, it becomes anger, and following the natural law of order, resentment and bitterness. And can I just say I feel tired just thinking about what I put myself through?

The bible says in Ephesians 4:26 'In your anger, do not sin. Do not let the sun go down on your wrath.' Put simply, do not go to bed angry. Because even God knows that when we are angry, we lose our rationality and our control. I have done so many things I am not proud of when I was angry. I hung up the phone on the person whom I loved, I used nasty words, I raised my voice. And they say a relationship brings out the best and worst in you. In any case, being angry eats into your soul and your energy. It is tiring. When you hate on someone, who suffers? It is definitely not the opposite party, but you. Hating or being angry on someone or something is like feeding poison to your soul.

Over the past year, i've learnt the importance of having a joyful spirit. Because positivity and negativity are like magnets. They attract. But converse to the law of magnetism, in this instance, like poles attract. A positive spirit attracts yet another positive one, whilst negativity attracts, mind you, negativity. So, how do we become that person you hate yet adore who always seem so optimistic about life that it feels sickening? Or the person who is always the center of attraction because of the joy thats coming out from them?

1) Change your mindset.
Tell yourself you want to be happy and that you're sick of being depressed or angry. Some of us actually take comfort in being sad and we feed on these emotions. It's so easy to remain sad rather than tell yourself to stop stirring your pity pot. Been there, done that. Get up, and get out! Yes i don't deny it's not easy but. just. try. Every morning, I wake up and proclaim that I'm happy and it's gonna be a good day. You'd be amazed at the power of confession. And, like they say, always look on the bright side of life. Being joyful about the things in life boost you additional strength to accomplish your tasks. Instead of going about your day with unhappiness and lethargy, why not help yourself go through the day with joy? And when something bad happens to me, I laugh it off. I thank myself for bringing laughter to me at my own expense. You'll be surprised to find so much things to laugh about.

2) Be thankful.
Have a spirit of gratitude. Instead of asking 'WHY' (did this happen to me), ask 'WHAT' (can i do to make it better) or 'HOW' (can i go about this). You don't have to be thankful for everything, but be thankful in everything. Most often, we don't understand why bad things happen to good people. But, accept it gracefully and know that the ordeal was put into your life for a reason. What reason, I don't know. But it definitely strengthens your character and enlarges your capacity. And, count your blessings. As St. Augustine said, "I cried for boots, till I saw a man who had no legs." Be thankful for a family that loves you, for your education, for the safety of your country, for the good governance of the political leaders (there, I said it). When you start to count your blessings, you'd realize you don't know where to stop.

3) Bless others.
Yes, the world really doesn't revolve around you. Instead of focusing inwards on your pain and doing all the self-pity, look outwards. Think about how you can be a blessing to the people around you, the people whom you love. The rewards are intangible. Make a commitment to improve the relationship you always wanted to with your siblings or your parents. Or how about the quiet girl/ guy who comes and goes unnoticed? Be a blessing to them. And if you believe in the laws of sowing and reaping, what you sow, you shall surely reap!

Be the joy that spreads contagiously to the people around. Let the joy come from within you :)